Align With Love

So many women share with me how they want a “real man” not a boy.
We want a man who is Masculine AND Loving. Strong AND Open.

As my husband Craig teaches men to do – we want a man who brings his balls and his heart together…

Mmmmhhhmmmm. YES! That’s the kind of man we want.

So…. how do we get it? How do we go about attracting a masculine man?

It starts with our own connection to our Feminine Presence. If we want the Masculine we have to bring the Feminine. Just like magnets right? Opposites attract.

And yet, we as women don’t really have a model in our culture of HOW to do this. We are inundated constantly with how to “look” more feminine… prettier… sexier…

But how do we really embrace the energy of it at our core? And where is the model for the empowerment in the feminine? WE are the ones creating it.

So a little history… Prior to the 1970’s women didn’t have a lot of choices outside of the home – outside of the “traditional feminine model”. Men were men and women were women and that was that. Sexual polarity was built in. Opposites attract.

Yet in the era of our grandmothers and, for those of us over 40, our mothers – women didn’t have power. And men certainly weren’t encouraged to feel their hearts.

Then in the 70’s it all changed. Women began reclaiming their power. We entered into predominantly “masculine” careers. And to do so we had to act like men. If you look at the fashions of that era, “powerful” women even dressed like men (and yes many still do).

Women had to take on a strong masculine shell to gain power and move ahead in a “man’s world” and I, for one, am so GRATEFUL to those Revolutionary Women. They opened the world for us.

At the same time, in the 70’s, men were encouraged to begin exploring their feelings. Opening their hearts. And the “new-age, heart-centered, spiritual man” was born, and I’m so grateful to him too. He brought the heart on board.

The problem is that it the “masculine woman” and the “feminine man” don’t tend to create strong polarity – there’s not a lot of hot sex going on in this dynamic. Yes, opposites attract – but not if we aren’t in connection with our true sexual essence. As David Deida (author of The Way of the Superior Man – which is a must read) writes: your true sexual essence is feminine if you want to be entered, and masculine if you want to enter.

So assuming you want to be entered… 😉 How do we get the Feminine back online in a totally empowered way – so that we can attract the HOT, Masculine, Loving man we yearn for?

It starts with feeling into your own heart.

Digging into the cracks and crevices. Exploring all that’s in there. Go on an adventure of self-discovery. The love, the joy, the hurt, the pain. ALL of it.

Begin to create a compassionate relationship with your own HEART. Allow the vulnerability to come out – allow it to come up.

Let the fear be there too – it’s all OK. It’s been with you all along.

Now is the time to get to know it –

deeply

intimately

lovingly

forgivingly

Treat your heart as you want your lover to treat you. Drop into that total intimacy with yourself.

What the Masculine truly desires in relationship is the Feminine Heart.

Your heart – your vulnerability – is your greatest gift.

Let’s embrace it.